So Long, 2018. Hello, 2019.

Hi friends, family, PJ fans and subscribers, everyone else, 

2018 has been an eventful year, not just for me and PJ, but for everyone. I’ve seen friends get married and engaged! Some added new additions to their families, while others started businesses, YouTube channels and blogs! Congratulations!

I didn’t just see good things happen this year though. I’ve seen and experienced some unpleasant things as well. 2018 taught me that no one is ‘safe’ from unpleasant things, no matter what sort of precautions you take.

In 2018, I saw the world struggle with balancing the billions of beliefs and identities that pervade it.

In 2018, I saw friends struggle with depression and anxiety. I’ve seen them struggling to survive in a world that constantly overlooks our individual pain. I’ve seen them continue to work at jobs they hate, compelled to work by the scary fact that they have no convenient alternative.

In 2018, I saw myself maneuver through the world with the agility of a cat, seeking some new adventure with new people from around the world.

In 2018, I saw myself grow spiritually and mentally. I shed the skin of my former self and emerged out of the dark past like a phoenix rising from warm ashes.

In 2018, I saw myself struggle with depression. I went from being excited and amazed by the progress I made with my sense of self, to being confused and afraid about this ‘new me.’

In 2018, I had the opportunity to experience how it feels to be lied to, without reason, by a person I held in high regard.

In 2018, I had another opportunity to experience the pains of losing a friend, due to their lack of empathy, and my lack of tolerance for it.

In 2018, I studied my face in the mirror, understanding – for what felt like the first time – what I want in life and what I want from myself.

In 2018, I sip hot cocoa, watching tiny bits of snow fall into place on my wooden balcony. The warm liquid tastes like bliss, with bits of cinnamon and nutmeg. I think, “what a year,” as I inwardly look forward to 2019 and the unpleasant and joyful experiences to come.


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